No Limits: A New Life Principle for Growth and Inspiration

There are no limits on me.

This is one of my new principles for life.

You know, the phrases and mantras you set to help you make decisions and navigate your way of living. The ones that keep you going when things feel tough. When you don’t know what you do.

And I came across this at a swimming lesson.

I was sick as a child, and that made me allergic to the water in British swimming pools. They overloaded the chlorine so much that even walking past a swimming pool building made me feel nauseated. And when the door opened for someone to go in—BAM! It felt like being hit with a wall of chlorine.

So I never learnt to swim.

Now I’m 30, I’m getting lessons (and very happy to say the Australian pools use less chlorine, and my skin is better so it doesn’t react so much).

Why does this relate to my new principle for life?

Well, in the few minutes at the end of the lesson, I had a quick chat with the other lady having lessons that day. She seemed to be doing so well to me, and I asked about the sports watch she was wearing. Turns out, though she was fairly new to swimming, she’d decided she was going to go all out and train to complete a triathlon.

I was amazed!

‘So you can already run and cycle?’

‘Not yet. But I’m also trying that.’

This year she had just decided she was going to start her fitness journey, learn to swim, and why not while she was at it give herself a big goal to motivate her?

A triathlon.

‘I just realised there are no limits on me, so why not do it? I can do whatever I want to try, really. If I’m going to learn how to swim, why not try for a triathlon?’

🤯

Why indeed.

A momentary meeting with a soulmate.

(The real kind, not the Hallmark movie romantic kind, but the people we meet every day—even just fleetingly—who provide sparks of ‘Oh, I was meant to meet you.’)

Because it’s true.

There are no limits on us. Save the ones we put on ourselves.

Sometimes we end up in environments that hold us down. Sometimes monetary situations, people, roles. But that’s not forever. It’s a period. And though no one ever knows how long that period might be, thinking about your limits and where you want to go can help you through whatever you’re struggling with.

So you can’t swim—YET. Who says you can’t learn and complete a triathlon? You may as well go all out if you’re learning. (If you want, you might not want to, and that’s okay.)

You might want to start writing. Why put a limit on it? One book? Rather, just say you want to write as much as you can. No limits. You might end up writing several.

Now, it’s that time of year we all reflect on how our year has been so far, or our whole life, and think about goals for next year. I started doing this a little, but found no specific goals came to mind.

Of course I want to keep drafting and publishing as many books as I can. Of course I want to continue in my goals towards financial freedom. Of course I want to keep growing towards a life of good health and vitality and fitness. Of course I want to continue growing as a good parent.

But nothing really sat with me as ‘I WANT TO DO X’.

And I realised it was because I was still reflecting on this limits thing.

There are no limits on me.

I can do whatever I want (really, within reason, of course).

I don’t know what this year will bring, but I know I’ll keep working towards all of my goals. But a lot can happen in a year, and for that reason, instead, I’ve decided to take things as they come, and look forward to exponential growth.

1 thing a day towards my goals is 365 things done in a year. That’s a lot.

Focusing on small daily habits helps you grow as a person incredibly. Exponentially. How can you plan for that? Except to take it day by day and enjoy it.

Perhaps now is the time we don’t think of goals, but instead think about the consistency we want to bring to 2025.

What are our life values?

Family? Fitness? Writing? Creativity? Learning? Language? Communication? The list goes on, but pick three.

Now look in your daily schedule and plan in even just 15 mins a day of each of those. Calendar it in. Make it a date for yourself. A must do. As much as possible.

From there, I like to track each day whether I do it. I love watching the little xs line up as I cross it off as complete each day.

Do I get around to doing it each and every day?

No. Life happens.

But I love watching it grow as much as it can. 4x a week. 5x a week. Sometimes 6x a week!

More than if I never put it in my calendar and hoped I remembered.

There are no limits on me. And that’s exciting. And it makes me want to do as much as I can towards my goals and dreams, because I’m so curious where it will end up.

Look again in 6 months.

1 year.

2 years.

Imagine where it can be in 5 years if you do a little bit every day.

The world will try to impose limits on you. But what if you chose to see those limits as temporary, and your potential as boundless?

Start small. Stay curious. And watch where you end up—because with no limits, the possibilities are endless. And the future is so exciting.

(And I WILL complete more book drafting this year! For those who are waiting for Dynasty Codes 3: Noble Blood and the next Haru & Yuka adventure, thank you so much for your patience! 🙏)

How about you? What are your values for 2025? What daily habits will help you bring them to life? Got any exciting creative projects in the works or that you’d like to begin?

Why You Shouldn't Pitch Your Book at the Snack Table (A Socialising Tip for Authors)

As an author, there’s nothing more exciting (or nerve-wracking) than meeting someone important in the book world—a literary agent, editor, another author, or even a publisher. You might feel like it’s your big moment to talk about your work, but there’s an important lesson I’ve learned that I want to share: not every encounter is the right time for business.

I once had a chance encounter with a well-known literary agent at a book event. We were both at the snack table, caught up in the world of cupcakes and coffee during a break between seminars. I was struggling to find the dietary-friendly snacks and then navigate all the different codes to find the right one for me, and she was kindly helping out. This turned into a casual, friendly conversation about which agency she was from, the growth of the romantasy genre and how agencies in Australia are now taking more interest in it, the crazy life of an agent. It was a lighthearted, insightful exchange, and we both enjoyed discussing the new trends in publishing.

But as we spoke, I noticed something: our conversation kept getting interrupted. People who recognised her as the agent they’d been emailing about submissions came up with questions like, “Did you get my email?” and “Oh, I’m the author who submitted X manuscript to you.” Some even wanted to ask her why she’d rejected their work—right there, while she was just trying to grab a snack.

She looked overwhelmed, and I could tell she was frustrated. It wasn’t the time or place for that kind of conversation. As I watched this unfold, I felt uncomfortable for both of us. I'm not sure about her, but I know for sure I wanted the floor to open up and swallow me whole. It was clear those interruptions weren’t just awkward; they were damaging to any chance those authors had of building a positive relationship with her. It became a lesson that I wish more authors knew: not every moment is a business moment.

Chance Encounters Are for Chitchat

In Leil Lowndes’ book How to Talk to Anyone, she offers a great piece of advice: “Chance encounters are for chitchat.” In other words, when you bump into someone important in your field, like an agent or publisher, it’s not the time to pitch your book or follow up on an email.

It might be tempting, especially if you’ve been waiting to hear back about your submission. But if you catch them at a social event, in a queue, or even by chance in a bookstore or café, the best thing you can do is keep it light, friendly, and casual. You want to leave a good impression, not overwhelm them when they’re clearly off duty.

"Chance encounters are for chitchat."

Why It’s Important to Respect Personal Time

Think about it from their perspective: agents, editors, and publishers are people, too. Just like the rest of us, they need time to unwind, enjoy a snack, or engage in a conversation without being bombarded with pitches. When authors press them in social settings about business, it can create a negative association with the person or their work.

It’s crucial to respect their personal time. Grilling them about your submission at a party or event will likely frustrate them and make them less inclined to respond positively when they do get to your email. It’s always better to leave business matters for the business space.

In the moment, just enjoy yourself socially and talk about what we all love best. Books, favourite books, annoying character deaths, and which movie adaptations were the worst and which were actually not terrible, unexpectedly.

We have so many things to talk about.

How to Handle These Encounters

So, what should you do if you run into someone important in the book world? Here are some simple tips to keep things professional and respectful:

1. Be gracious and casual. If you happen to meet an agent or editor, greet them kindly and engage in light conversation. Maybe ask them about what they’re reading, their thoughts on a recent book trend, or even just how they’re enjoying the event. You can mention you’re a writer, but don’t push for a conversation about your book or submission.

   
   

2. Focus on building a connection. Instead of pitching your book, focus on building rapport. You can still make a good impression without diving into the details of your project. They’ll likely appreciate the break from work-related conversations, and you’ll come across as someone they’d enjoy talking to again in the future.

   
   

3. Leave business for later. If you really want to follow up on something business-related, wait until after the event and send a thoughtful email. You can always mention that you met them briefly at [X-named event] and enjoyed the conversation, but keep the business talk out of chance encounters.

   
   

4. Respect their boundaries. Pay attention to their cues. If they seem like they’re trying to enjoy a moment of downtime, it’s best to leave the conversation at that. The more you respect their personal time, the more positively they’ll remember you.

   
   

What Happens When You Don’t Follow This Advice?

I’ve seen firsthand what happens when authors don’t respect this boundary. At the event I mentioned, the agent was visibly frustrated, and those authors likely damaged their future chances with her. It wasn’t because their books were bad or because she didn’t want to talk to them—she just wasn’t in the right headspace for business at that moment. And I don't blame her.

By pressuring someone in a non-professional setting, you risk being remembered for the wrong reasons. Instead of having a productive conversation later on, you may have burned a bridge without even realising it. And in an industry that's already notoriously challenging to break into, you don't want to risk losing even one potential connection.

Stay Calm and Be Kind

The publishing world can feel daunting, and it’s natural to want to grab every opportunity to promote your work. But not every encounter is the right time to pitch. The next time you meet an important industry person outside of a formal business setting, remember: it’s okay to just have a friendly chat.

(And please, remember to smile. Be friendly.)

Let your professionalism and kindness leave a lasting impression, and save the business talk for when they’re in a business frame of mind. You’ll build stronger, more respectful connections—and that will benefit your career far more in the long run.

Make Time for Boredom: Creativity in the Idle Moments

In your busy day, do you make time for boredom?

I remember days that stretched on forever as a child, where I felt I ran out of things to do and lay on the floor staring at the ceiling, tracing patterns in the paintwork with my eyes and feeling like time would never end.

Those days, I daydreamed about so much, and I played make-believe with so many ideas my current writer self would envy.

I wondered how I had so much creativity back then, and it was only in reading advice to embrace boredom—to even create time for boredom—that I realised perhaps this was it.

One evening, instead of meditating (my mind was too chattery), I lay on my floor like a star and stared up at my ceiling.

I traced the cracks in the paintwork with my eyes, and looked at the different patches of white.

I let my mind wander as I stared, and I let the emptiness of the moment take over.

Embracing boredom.

If anyone ever told me lying on my floor and staring at the ceiling would be of benefit to me, I’d have raised a brow and stared at them as if they were odd.

But really, it was brilliant.

My mind chattered itself out.

Ideas returned.

My inner dialogue mulled over many things, including ideas for books, blogs, work I could be doing for my coaching.

People I wanted to speak with. Interviews I wanted to hold.

It reminds me of the advice Neil Gaiman shared in an interview with Tim Ferriss, about how his routine was to sit at his desk. He’d either stare at the wall, or he’d write.

“You don’t have to write. You have permission to not write, but you don’t have permission to do anything else.”—Neil Gaiman

He said at some point it got boring staring at the wall and so he’d end up writing.

“You get ideas from daydreaming. You get ideas from being bored. You get ideas all the time. The only difference between writers and other people is we notice when we’re doing it.”—Neil Gaiman

But do you give yourself that time to daydream, to be bored, to let ideas flow?

This is your sign. Your permission slip.

It’s not wasting time to embrace boredom.

To stare at the ceiling or the wall. Or lie on the grass and stare at the sky as the clouds scud past?

You don’t need to have a grand plan to create ideas and enhance your writing.

You just need to give yourself permission to be bored, and let your mind chatter away to itself.

And if an idea hits, let it keep running away with itself.

Perhaps keep a pen and paper beside you, just in case!